Shimakawa Sensei and a Life Changing Moment

After the snow started I was sad and thought I'd have to wait until spring until my next adventure with him.  Around October he starts talking about hockey constantly.  Having never played myself and having no equipment, I didn't think I'd have much of a chance to play.  I didn't want to spend the hundreds of dollars on equipment and league fees only to embarrass myself and Minnesotans alike by getting schooled by old ladies in hockey so I spent most of October resisting his constant invitations to go play hockey.  I guess I was still a little too stuck in American-Tom's way of thinking at the time and used the excuse that hockey equipment was too expensive.

 After I told him that I didn't want to play because the gear would be too expensive, he did something that has changed my life.  It was a turning point for me.  Before I tell you what he did, I think it's important to know how much of a greedy person I was.

 While in America I was greedy. My first thought whenever am opportunity came up was "how much is this going to cost?"  When I would eat dinner with my friends (most of whom already make much more money than I ever will make)  I would be like "What the heck why aren't you paying you are making twice as much as me?"  Wilbur and I went hiking at Old Rag maybe 5 times and I drove once.  I would wake up on my birthday morning and expect people to buy me things.  I would get angry when people did not say "happy birthday" or buy my things.  I might occasionally buy lunch for Andy or Wilbur or a friend, but only rarely and I'd never do it for anyone unless I thought they'd return the favor later.  Heather would go out for dinner with friends and I'd be an idiot overbearing boyfriend and be like "now did you really need to go out to eat, you don't need that drink, you could have saved 10 dollars by staying home tonight."  I have no idea how she still liked me, that just shows you how nice she is.  But anyhoo, I mean, I don't have kids, mama and papa were very generous in helping out with college expenses and my only expenses in Maryland were rent, car payment, and food.  I had plenty of money absolutely no reason to be greedy.

 So back to the story.  The day after I said that I didn't want to play hockey because the equipment would be too expensive, he comes to school with a 300 dollar barely-used hockey stick and says "Hey, Tomasu, present."  That was it.

This is a guy who I had done absolutely nothing for.  He found wild plants and gave them to me.  He always packed the lunch for the treks in the mountains and I would eat all his food for lunch.  Then he would cook up the plants for dinner and I ate all his food for dinner and kept all the leftovers.  I had literally never done anything for him up until this point other than eat his food.  He has a pretty big house and 3 kids.  He's not making much more money than I am, and since I don't have a car or 3 kids or a house payment, I guarantee I had more personal spending money every month than he does, yet he hands me a 300 dollar hockey stick as if it's a jolly rancher.

After that I realized how stupid I was for not wanting to spend a couple hundred dollars on hockey equipment.  I can't really describe what went through my mind for about the next day.  Lots of thinking and regretting all the times that I turned down invitations just so that I could save a few bucks.  When I die, I guarantee that I will have more than 300 dollars in my bank account, and I will never be able to come back to Japan to play in a hockey league.  Who cares if I'm busy or have less spending money, I will have experiences that I will remember a lifetime.  It is so clear to me now how stupid I was for ever using money as an excuse to miss out on an opportunity.

Plus, I have learned that being generous is a fantastic way to find out how people truly are.  If you are nice to someone and buy them dinner and they are very thankful and return the kindness later on, then you know they're a nice person.  If you buy someone dinner and they barely muster up a "thanks" and don't repay the favor, then you know not they're probably not the type of person worth spending time and money with. 

This blog entry probably is a bit difficult to follow and hard to understand but I strongly urge any of you that are putting off that trip or experience "because it costs too much" to stop being like American-Tom and start being like Shimakawa-sensei and start experiencing this world.  Who cares if you die with a million dollars or zero dollars.  You'll be happier with zero dollars and a lifetime of experiences than with a million dollars and never leaving the comfort of a sheltered world.  I know mama you always talk about visiting national parks.  When I come back to the states, we are taking several weekend road trips to national parks.  Who cares if it costs a lot of money or we're sleep deprived, after we're done with the trip we'll have the memory that will last a lifetime.  One thing that I will never take for granted again is America's awesome interstate system.  Driving from Aomori to Tokyo costs well over 100 dollars in tolls and gas is pushing 10 dollars a gallon.  In America interstates are free and gas is cheap, no reason to ever complain about money or let it get in the way of experiencing the world.  We're going to national parks.

So for all of the food, presents and experiences that he has given me, the thing I am most indebted to Shimakawa sensei for is changing my outlook on life and freeing me from being a slave to money.